I failed to mention in the previous journal entry blog post that I picked up some extra homegrown dried cannabis from my mom’s house and put it in my weed smoking kit (but I have not yet smoked because I have been trying to keep my memory as sharp as possible (and I felt compelled to get the weed yesterday because I was dealing with some particularly annoying sonic harassment and wanted something to help me feel better)). Anyway, in this journal entry I would like to share some very intense and elaborate dreams I had while sleeping at “the cave”.
The first intense dream went like this: I was in my old house in the room which used to be a guest room with a queen sized bed in it and which is now (in “real life”) my maternal grandfather’s bedroom and office. In the dream, that room was dark and it was after midnight and I was sharing the bed with AJP. Something happened in which we started fighting with each other and he flashed in and out of being present in the room. That part of the dream was creepy and intense and I was in survival mode. I think AJP was trying to kill me with a gun and I somehow manifested a gun and then a taser (because my preferred weapon of self defense is a taser). I think I threatened him with it and he disappeared. I heard his voice talking saying something like, “What’s the matter? You don’t have the courage to for us to touch each other?” Then the room lit up and I was alone and practicing how to fight in self defense while screaming angrily and imagining throwing a wooden chair at my enemy. Then the dream flashed to me laying in the bed of my old bedroom (with the bed up against the window like how it used to be in 2015 and not like how it is in “real life” after that room has been remodeled to look like a couple’s hotel room). I opened both of the windows which are located near the east most corner of that bedroom to hear the sound of birds chirping. I heard some middle-to-high-school aged boys at the house next-door talking about how I was not working any jobs because I wanted to focus on studying. They were wearing clear plastic ponchos and it was lightly raining and the pre-dawn sunlight made the raindrops visible. I wondered how I woke up in my old bedroom when I remembered going to sleep in the downstairs guest room. No one else was in the house except for my dad. I was trying to turn off the lights in my bedroom by clicking the on/off switch and by adjusting the dimmer switch but the light stayed on at its brightest setting. I saw tthat my dad was in the master bedroom of that house but my mom was not present. I told my dad that I had a scary dream about almost getting murdered in the downstairs bedroom and then I woke up because some guy who attends early morning classes at the church I was sleeping at saw me. He said I could stay there but would have to go somewhere else after that to sleep and he gave me four Chewy bars (which I gobbled up in one sitting). Then I went back to sleep and had another creepy dream in which I was at my bedroom at my dad’s house but there was a bed in it positioned like how it used to be back in 2016 before I moved the bed out of that room. Jessie Lee Joseph was living in that house in my dream and, in “real life” she lived at that house for at least a year until 2019. In the dream, I woke up to see her trying to inject me with tranquilizer and put some kind of restraint device on me (and I felt almost too sedated to move even though I was fully awake). I threatened to call the 911 on her to report what she was doing and somehow I was able to reach my phone and dial 911 and, as I did, Jessie left the room and barked something like, “Put on some weight, will ya?”. I somehow ended up standing outside no longer sedated in a rather beautiful area next to nice, big houses and sprawling hills and mountains with trees (like a scene from Tuscany, Italy) while talking on the phone. I was talking to the police about how I used the It clown as a photo ID because I thought it was an interesting character and it made me look scary when I thought I was really nice. Then I woke up because either that guy gave me Chewy bars or something else woke me up (my memory of the order of events is not clear and I remember talking to myself (and to the voices being beamed into my skull from law enforcement (or whoever)) about how time seems nonlinear and I had weirdly prophetic “visions” which made me think that I travel back and forth through time and/or that time is an illusory construct to hide how complicated and nonlinear so-called causality really is).
Anyway, after laying there for a while and continuing to have ongoing philosophical and just eclectic conversations with myself and with law enforcement “telepathically” while awake and asleep (and somewhere between being awake and asleep), I decided to administer my second testosterone injection right there. It was the easiest injection I have ever given myself because I had everything I needed and did a good job pulling the skin before inserting the needle to prevent excessive bleeding upon removing the needle. This time I injected into my left thigh muscle instead of my right thigh muscle (and I alternate legs each injection (and I inject 0.5 milliliters of testosterone in oil (from that little vial I have prescribed to me by doctors from Planned Parenthood in San Fransisco (in the Tenderloin District on Bush Street) and sent to CVS in Castro Valley for pickup) once per every two weeks)).
I am sitting on the sidewalk in Castro Valley on my way to the Castro Valley BART station to go to Dublin to work on my primary website and to get some goodies to eat from Whole Foods Market in Dublin. I’ll see how long I can stand to go without smoking the weed.
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I forgot to mention the part of my dreams from earlier this morning in which I saw “my” blue Toyota Matrix and some orange mountain bicycle parked on the lawn beneath “my” bedroom window at “my” old house. In the dream I remember thinking about how I wanted to use that bicycle as my primary means to get around.
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I was able to successfully order a camping battery from Amazon and have it sent to SED’s San Leandro house earlier this year (specifically in March 2022). Perhaps I will attempt to use that address as an alternative to renting a post office box and an alternative to using my dad’s house (especially after seeing how little mail I get there and how most of the mail I get there is delayed if it ever does arrive).
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