Though I may have mentioned this in my journal before (my memory is a bit porous these days), my father took my backpack with my laptop computer and survival gear inside of it “hostage” on his way to Santa Rita County Jail to pick me up after being incarcerated for about a week for vandalizing (i.e. using my keys to make scratch marks into the paint of) some “random” stranger’s car allegedly (according to my dad) in order to give it to me at the jail in case I did not want to return to Castro Valley (and that incident happened either in the summer of 2019 or else in the summer of 2020 or else in the summer of 2021). I think I may have accused my father of deliberately trying to cause me distress by appearing to be withholding my most essential and cherished personal possessions (and tools for my life’s work) as a means of inflicting some kind of punishment or control tactics on me. I would prefer to believe that he did not intend what I just described and, instead, just wanted to make it easier for me to carry on with my life’s work (which seems to include me preferring to camp outside and not always go to my legal address at night). A part of me always assumes what I deem to be “the worst” in people is the most likely to be the case and I cannot help but categorize the incident I described in this journal entry as a deliberate violation of my personal boundaries in order to assert dominance and/or inflict suffering (though I will be kind and open minded enough to suggest that the incident I described could have been implemented in order to hasten my progress towards my goals). If I leave my office of a backpack in my room, I will put a note on top of it which says “DO NOT REMOVE THIS BACKPACK FROM THIS ROOM WITHOUT THE CONSENT OF KAR BERINGER”. I am hoping that this note deters people touching my backpack while left unattended by me (especially while I leave it in my room at my dad’s house or in some hotel room which I am renting). Other than the contents of this note, I do not have much else to say other than I am doing my best to mind my own business and do a good job at whatever (mostly) harmless and (mostly) legal activities are. Thank you for your understanding 🙂 and I look forward to an increasingly meaningful New Year’s transition for the rest of my body’s duration. (By “meaningful”, I mean to insinuate that whatever that adjective describes is sufficiently worth my time and energy investment according to me).
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